I used to get angry when I felt used by people. Over the years I found myself caught in the middle of strange situations that always lend themselves to strange circumstances and outcomes. Here is an interesting tale that happened just this week.
Just this past week I met two complete strangers on the set of Talk It Out Live who were guest on the show. They were two pastors from a forming church in Winston Salem. They felt they had found the new idea and concept for starting a new an and improved form of religious experience. Upon learning that I played guitar they asked me to help them put together a band for their launch service this past Sunday.
After one service I found myself in a peculiar situation. In my heart I felt I was walking a fine line of what I felt was right and what I felt was false fed. Let me expand on the false fed idea. When I was ask to play for this church I was offered a set amount to organize a band to play for a two week period. Generally churches who pay their musicians are very large very well organized congregations not a 3 man operation. I will say that the idea of getting paid to play once a week on Sunday morning was enticing. I thought to myself, "why not" maybe this would be a chance to make some extra cash before the baby comes. Note to self, never trust anyone you don't know.
One day after the first service I received an email from one of the pastors which concerned me. I could tell by the message that I had gotten into something that would potentially come to an abrupt halt at a moments notice. I moved forward and hoped the next week service would work out better. Things were going well until this past Wednesday the rubber hit the road.
After selecting the songs, arranging music, and organizing a practice of my hand picked musicians we got together this past Wednesday night to jam. One of my invited guest happened to be a part of this particular church and showed up shortly after we had started practice. Judging by the look on this dude's face I could tell he carried a weight very heavy on his shoulders. When we had paused to take a break he asked me if he could speak to me outside. So I accompanied him and we began to chat. Apparently a song or two I had chosen didn't met the expectation of what this person may or may have not had in mind for a Sunday morning service. The interesting fact here is that I was given the green light to play whatever songs I felt appropriate at my discretion and that the previous weeks songs for service were great. After a few moments of debate on what vision this church had and what "it"(music) looked like I found myself at a place where my perception of what I was doing was being totally challenged. A statement made in by this person probably said without any knowledge of what it meant led me to simply turn my head and say "enough". So I walked away told 3 very tired hard working musicians we would not be playing this Sunday or any other Sunday for this church. So in an instant, easy come became easy go.
My reason for posting this story is simple. Everyone has ideas on the different ways to spread the gospel. Some of us choose roads less traveled and others find away to twist and turn a book so old that its true meaning is being missed out by many. At the end of the day what matters is where is your heart is, and what makes you happy? I found peace along time ago without playing praise and worship or guitar and it wasn't the next big thing in the religious realm. It was a simple change of heart and everything else fell into place without any smoke and mirrors.
I had to change my heart, my way of thinking, and that was it. To hell with all the other stuff. Love is what we need. Peace
